I Don’t Want to Be a Heroic Spirit

"Mordred, sit down."

Artoria's sharp voice halted Mordred mid-tantrum, and she suddenly thought of Inuyasha. Perhaps it was the familiar ring of that commanding "Sit!"—it always worked to keep Inuyasha in line.

Come to think of it, Mordred really was a lot like Inuyasha—just as noisy and chaotic.

"What for? I didn't even say anything wrong…" Mordred grumbled, folding her arms across her chest as she reluctantly sat down, muttering under her breath.

That was enough for Artoria. Changing someone's mindset was a monumental task, especially someone as stubborn as Mordred, whose will could outlast even ten bulls. Pushing her too hard might just lead to a repeat of the Battle of Camlann.

Getting her to sit down and obey was already a victory.

Still, Artoria knew she needed to apologize. Unlike Mordred, she couldn't afford to act so capriciously.

"My apologies. Mordred's words were rude," Artoria said, bowing her head slightly toward Jeanne, her sincerity radiating from her demeanor.

"N-no, it's fine. I actually think this… uh…" Jeanne glanced at Mordred, who was visibly displeased, and hesitated before continuing awkwardly, "Miss Mordred?"

"You trying to pick a fight? Damn it, I'll smash you!" Mordred snapped, raising a fist.

"Eek!" Jeanne shrieked, clutching her head in panic, her face full of despair. She had no idea why Mordred had become even angrier.

"Ahem!" Artoria coughed lightly into her fist before addressing Jeanne. "Mordred doesn't like being referred to as either a girl or a boy. Just call her by her name without any honorifics."

"…I think I'll stick with calling her Red Saber."

"That works too." Artoria stroked her chin thoughtfully, nodding in agreement.

"Well then…" Jeanne coughed softly, mimicking Artoria's earlier gesture. Her cheeks flushed slightly, perhaps embarrassed by how rattled she had been earlier. "I have to admit… Red Saber isn't entirely wrong."

"To be able to share the rank of Ruler with the great King Arthur is truly an honor."

The name "King Arthur" seemed to inspire respect beyond measure.

"But I have a question…" Jeanne looked directly into Artoria's eyes, her tone turning serious. "You mentioned earlier that the Ruler of the previous Holy Grail War committed some violations. What exactly did you mean?"

According to legend, Jeanne d'Arc had been moved to join the battlefield after hearing the voice of God. It was this story that inspired her Revelation skill as a Heroic Spirit, granting her something akin to foresight.

Moments ago, as Artoria mentioned the previous Ruler's misconduct, Jeanne's Revelation activated, heightening her interest in the topic.

"I believe your manifestation in this world was incomplete, forcing you to rely on possessing a human host. Is that correct?" Artoria asked.

"Yes." Jeanne nodded, not disputing this fact. "The body I am using belongs to a young girl named Laeticia… Though I would never wish to drag an ordinary person into such a brutal conflict."

Involving civilians in the Holy Grail War was a blatant violation of its rules, yet Jeanne had no other choice.

"Fortunately, Laeticia's life is protected. Once I leave the stage, her body will be safely transported out of the war's vicinity."

Jeanne frowned slightly. "There is definitely something unusual about this Holy Grail War. My incomplete summoning is proof enough. So… is the irregularity caused by that Ruler predecessor?"

"Yes," Artoria confirmed, before proceeding to explain Amakusa Shirou Tokisada's involvement.

"The Ruler of the previous Holy Grail War managed to live for sixty years in this world? And now he's one of the Masters on the Red side?"

Jeanne was visibly shocked by the revelation.

"Of course, if you don't want to take my word for it, you can verify this with the others present here, who are also aware of the truth," Artoria said calmly. "Or you could go to the Red faction's base to confirm it yourself. But aside from Ruler Amakusa Shirou Tokisada, most of the Red Masters are imprisoned. The only ones you can question are Amakusa himself and the Servants stationed there."

"Imprisoning Masters… isn't that against the rules?" Jeanne exclaimed, slamming her hands on the table. "And how can a Servant participate as a Master? Isn't that a blatant violation?"

"I don't see it as a violation," Artoria countered, her tone unwavering. "If Amakusa had seized another's Command Seals or Master qualification by force, that would be different. But the Grail system selected and acknowledged him as a Master. If the system itself recognizes his eligibility, why shouldn't you?"

"But… he's a Servant! Isn't that unfair to the other Masters?"

"This is a war, Jeanne. Wars are inherently unfair," Artoria replied firmly. "If war were fair or reasonable, it wouldn't have been such a prevalent part of human history."

Jeanne was left speechless.

"Then… what about imprisoning the Masters?"

"This Holy Grail War, at its core, is a variation of a battle royale. Whether the Red or Black faction wins, it will inevitably come down to a fight for survival with only one victor. Amakusa simply acted preemptively by neutralizing his supposed allies. Doesn't that make sense?"

"…"

It… kind of does.

Rumor has it Jeanne was utterly flustered and left bewildered by Artoria's arguments.

Noticing the darkening sky outside, Kairi called out.

"Ruler."

Both Artoria and Jeanne turned their heads in unison. "Yes?"

Kairi winced. He'd forgotten Jeanne was also a Ruler. This was going to get confusing.

"Just call me Artoria," she said, breaking the silence. "It'll be easier that way."

"Then… please just call me Jeanne," the saint added with a small smile. In her mind, Artoria was clearly the more fitting Ruler between them, so she didn't mind foregoing formalities.

"Well then… ah, excuse me." Kairi cleared his throat and addressed Artoria. "It's time for us to move. We should be on our way."

---

Oh? You're still here? Wow. Either you really enjoy my company, or you scrolled too fast and forgot to close the tab. Either way—respect.

Now, since I have your attention, let's talk business. Web fluid, coffee, replacement suits—being me isn't cheap. And last I checked, saving the world doesn't come with a salary. Tragic, I know.

But you can make a difference! By supporting [patreon.com/WiseTL], you're not just helping a poor, overworked Spider-Man—you're securing front-row seats to even more chaos, bad jokes, and possibly a few existential crises.

So go on, be a hero. Support the cause. And who knows? Maybe I'll name my next web trick after you. (Probably not, but hey, worth a shot.)

Stay cool, don't trust bald telepaths, and always double-check your web cartridges.

— Xia Luo 🕷️