I Became a Burden to the Conscienceless Party

Whack!
Esmeralda’s decisive strike.
She spoke and struck as if it was the finishing blow, but of course Irina wouldn’t fall from just this.
She too was a member of the hero party.
How could she who had overcome all sorts of trials together fall from just one punch?

‘Come on, show me. Your worries, your contradictions. The reason why you had to be in pain, had to worry, had to break down…!’

Unlike usual, Irina was too careless. If she really intended to make her into a holy relic, she should have put her to sleep so she couldn’t wake up.
Even if that wasn’t the case, she should have taken at least minimal measures to prevent her from moving.
But she didn’t do that.
She just imprisoned her in a cell she could easily escape from and didn’t even place guards to watch it.
And even her subordinates were asking to stop Irina. Isn’t it obvious?
Irina’s brainwashing deceives even herself. It makes her do things she doesn’t want to do, saying it’s what must be done.
She had to go mad and willingly chose to go mad.
But that shouldn’t be.
Even if you deceive the world, you shouldn’t deceive yourself at least.
Especially if it’s so precarious that even others can see it.

“Haaap!”

The battle continues.
Esmeralda tried to save even Irina who said she would grind her up to make a holy relic.
Because that’s the path she believes in. Because that’s the path she chose to walk.
The Irina she has seen so far is not someone who would rashly come to conclusions even if she had such thoughts.
Esmeralda doesn’t believe Irina, but she believes in herself.
So she believes in herself who thinks Irina wouldn’t do that.
With such a determined resolve, Esmeralda stepped towards Irina who was flying away after being hit in the face.
And at that moment.

Whack!

“Huh?”

Irina’s morningstar flew towards Esmeralda’s face.
True to the weapon’s name, stars appeared in Esmeralda’s head.
A bold counterattack. A force that seemed to have no hesitation whatsoever.
Of course, a woman who concluded she would grind her up to make a holy relic might not hesitate in her attacks.

‘This bitch hits my face?’

The wound wasn’t too severe. After all, it was a blow from a priest.
Of course, the fact that the means was a morningstar full of thorns couldn’t be overlooked. Esmeralda, who barely avoided a fatal wound by dodging, thought.

‘How dare she?’

No, the opposite. The moment she was hit in the face, her mind went blank.
So she forgot why she was fighting, and even forgot the fact that she had first punched Irina’s face before that.
When your head rings, your cool-headed mind completely flies away.
Esmeralda’s following attack was filled only with emotion.

“Kuk!”

This time Esmeralda’s bold fist strikes Irina’s waist.
Abandoning her composure and forgetting her cause, she only expressed her anger with the thought ‘This crazy bitch just hit my face?’
Her mindset was good, but Esmeralda was still an immature hero. It was inevitable that she would be swept away by emotions.

‘Whew, to lose your reason over just this much, you’re too predictable.’

But Irina was the opposite.
She who had lived as a nun could maintain her composure even in such a dramatic situation.
Yes, she was cool-headed.
As she flew away with her waist bent, she coolly grabbed Esmeralda’s hair tightly.

“Kyaak?!”

Esmeralda’s mind went even blanker at Irina’s counterattack that once again touched on a woman’s pride.
The situation had already become one where the opponent was no longer someone to persuade and save, but a mortal enemy who needed to be taught a lesson.
If your hair is grabbed, it’s justice to grab the other’s hair too.
Esmeralda acted based on an extremely common-sense way of thinking.
That’s why…

“Huh?”

Esmeralda’s arm reaching for Irina’s white hair was caught by handcuffs that appeared in mid-air.
Yes, Irina was cool-headed. Because she was cool-headed, she provoked Esmeralda.
Brainwashing, suggestion, threats, instigation.
Abilities to move, guide, and deceive people’s hearts.
Irina knows Esmeralda’s personality. She knows that she will try to save even someone like herself.
Because she was the hero. Because she was a righteous person enough to prevent Irina from rashly coming to conclusions.
Irina had already decided to fall into the abyss, but she was still cool-headed in such aspects.
Her actions might be wrong. She might wish someone would stop her.
While thinking such things, her mind prepared the optimal method.

Holy Magic
Purification System Wide-Area Technique
[White Light Hot Sand Wave]

Paaah!
Saint Irina’s holy magic that can turn demons to dust.
Hot sand shining with white light rushed like a wave towards the restrained Esmeralda.
A force that would have literally ground the opponent to pieces from the aftereffects of the holy power contained in each grain of sand if they were a demon.
Even if the opponent was human, there’s no way they could be safe after being engulfed by such powerful force.
Getting caught in the [White Light Hot Sand Wave] without even being able to defend at this distance, the result was already decided.
Of course, that’s…

“Wow, that was really dangerous just now. Really, my mind went blank, I don’t know when you brainwashed me.”
“It wasn’t quite brainwashing. You just got worked up and rushed in without considering things, Hero.”

When the opponent isn’t the hero.
If it had been someone with similar abilities to her, it would have certainly taken them down.
But Esmeralda grinned while bleeding profusely.

“Thanks to that, I’ve become cool-headed again. Shall we continue then?”
“That’s right. Now that it seems I have the advantage. Let’s get serious.”

Passion and composure.
The two charged at each other again with contrasting emotions.

Irina wished for a miracle.
Even if it wasn’t bestowed upon her, she wished for it to actually exist in this world.
She had lived and acted thoroughly at every moment.
Thus, she had committed sins in a manner unsuitable for a believer.
Without leaving any loose ends, without worrying about the aftermath.
She acted like that and yet wished for someone to punish such a self.
She was disgusted at performing hypocrisy and tormented by having to hide evil deeds.
Yes, if someone were to expose her shortcomings despite her acting so thoroughly, wouldn’t that be a miracle? Wouldn’t that mean the return of the Celestial God?

‘But that shouldn’t happen, right?’

Her being exposed like that would mean the second fall of the Celestial Order.
She was walking a similar path to the previous Pope, just without betraying God.
She must never be exposed, but she still wished she would be.
If she dies, this time the monasteries and orphanages supported by the Celestial Order will face destruction.
The world is harsh, people are indifferent to others, and the Empire mistreats and squeezes commoners.
In such a situation, if even the Celestial Order abandons the abandoned children, too many lives will perish.
So she must be tainted by evil.
To save people, she must threaten and brainwash people.
Such a contradictory situation is the root cause that makes Irina the most sick.

“Haha.”

For the Order.
For the Celestial God.
For the world.
For people who need someone to take care of them.
Yes, for two values that cannot coexist at present.
That’s Irina’s justice.
But now she must abandon one. The authority of the Celestial Order that she raised through all sorts of frauds and political maneuvers has come to a level that cannot improve further. Any more and it will become just an interest group, not an order.
Such a final line is drawn.
That’s why she desperately needed a miracle. She missed the past when she could devotedly follow God’s teachings without worry.

“You know, Hero, I think I’ve come too far.”

But Jim was not her miracle. He ended up proving that miracles don’t exist after all.
An encounter that couldn’t even be a coincidence.
The sight of Jim packaging that as a miracle was so sorrowful, like representing the current world.
She freshly realized it.
That indeed, there are no more miracles left in this world.
The arrival of a miracle means she receives divine punishment.
Her receiving divine punishment means the Celestial Order she barely stabilized collapses again.
Yes, it couldn’t have existed in the first place.
Distracted by such delusions, she foolishly came to a point of no return.

“See? In the end, miracles didn’t exist.”

Irina looked down at Esmeralda lying fallen with a miserable expression.
Her wounds were already fatal, and no matter how much she tried to recover, it was impossible to defeat the current Irina.
If that were possible, it would truly be a miracle. But Esmeralda couldn’t cause such a miracle.
Because miracles no longer existed in this world.

“You said earlier, didn’t you? That even if you use the Hero’s corpse, you won’t be able to create a holy relic.”

In fact, at the moment she heard those words, Irina could notice that it wasn’t a lie.
She was skilled at piercing through people’s minds after all. She could tell at least that much, that she wasn’t lying.
And actually, she had doubted from the beginning. She had predicted it was impossible.
It was strange from the start to cling to one past record and try to recreate it.

‘Ah, I see. So I was already…’

Broken.
Running towards failure.
To meet the worst end that would cut off this thread of evil deeds.
She had been pushing herself into the abyss. And now that she’s reached the end, she’s too scared to even move.
She rushed recklessly, but in the end, she’s a fool who stopped at the door.
That’s the figure of Irina now, looking down at the fallen hero without being able to do anything.
The Celestial Order won’t be able to recover its past authority any further, and in the end, it won’t be able to prevent the deaths of the weakest.
Yes, the weak die. That’s the way of the world. Irina, who tried to somehow twist that, was trying to go against the way of the world.
A foolish being who tried to recreate non-existent miracles.
The limit of an ordinary person who dared to challenge God’s wonders.

“Ahaha…”

Even now, it’s vivid in her eyes.
The cold corpses of the people in the monastery who died of starvation while embracing each other like a family.
The end of that misfortune.
She tried to prevent more such people from appearing, but it seems she’s reached her limit now.

“That’s right. I guess that’s what ideals are. They’re called ideals because they dream of miracles that can’t happen.”

Irina used a healing spell on the fallen Esmeralda.
Her holy power, which had been sharply honed for attack, softens and envelops Esmeralda.
The fight with Esmeralda was fierce, so Irina was also quite severely injured.
If she needed to heal, she should have done so for herself too, but she didn’t care.
She no longer had thoughts of living. Even if she shook off the ignorance covering her eyes, she had come too far.

“You know, Hero, thinking about it now, I think the journey with you was quite enjoyable.”

Create a holy relic from the hero. That was Irina’s goal.
She approached with such a goal, but in the end, she gave up on it.
Irina just wasted time.
This is the result in the end.

‘I…’

What on earth was I trying to do?
Was I running towards failure?
If even the evil of using the hero to create a holy relic was actually impossible from the start.
If everything she has done until now was meaningless.
If all her evil deeds, good deeds, hesitations, and resolutions were worthless.
Irina cannot choose.
Now that she knows the possibility that it’s impossible, she can’t perform the ritual using Esmeralda like this.
The last conscience left in her.
And more than anything else.

“The world will need you more than someone like me.”

After all, if miracles can’t be recreated, there needs to be hope in this world. And she thought that at least it wouldn’t be herself.
So Esmeralda shouldn’t be sacrificed. No, all life is like that. She shouldn’t have dared to sacrifice and discriminate between them.
She was just too foolish to realize this only now.

“Don’t forgive me, Hero.”

She pours all her remaining holy power into healing Esmeralda.
To the point of excess. Not leaving even a speck to use on herself.
To leave no regrets.

“May you be able to punish evil and preach justice. May you not make foolish choices like me.”

With such a prayer, Irina staggered away. It’s the end now.
If she headed to where the priests are like this, she might be able to live, but she didn’t want to.
Because she was too tired.
Because she wanted to let everything go now.
Then to a place where she could confess her sins. To the place where all past original sins began and ended.
Yes, the place that brought down the Celestial Order.
And created the current Order.
Miserably in that terrible open space.

“…”

Let’s meet a miserable end.
As Irina reached the place where the previous Pope supposedly pulled down the Celestial God like that, she could discover.

“Why…”

She was shocked as if discovering something that couldn’t exist.

“Why are you here…”

In the middle of the open space that should have been desolate was a young man smiling gently, unlike usual.
Eyes with a blue light unlike usual look at Irina.
Like a scene from a fairy tale.
With a feeling like a Mary Sue that simply solves everything.
Yes, innocently, purely.
Holding out a flower blooming in the field in front of Irina’s eyes, he said.

“Won’t you talk with me for a moment? Saint.”