Villain Hiring: Help! Author Wants Me Dead

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Oh, fuck no.

At first, everything was going great.

My dear little villain had finally stopped acting like a coward.

He was listening to me.

He understood that this world wouldn't wait for him to grow stronger at his own pace.

He was finally acting like a villain—or at least pretending to be one.

That was all we needed to fool the Author.

But then… something changed.

The moment he smiled—that wicked, unhinged, I-am-so-ready-to-burn-this-world-down smile, I knew we had a problem.

This wasn't the usual Noah.

This wasn't my cautious, slightly paranoid, morally confused idiot.

This was the other one.

The crazy one.

The one that scared even me.

And then he moved.

No hesitation.

No unnecessary words.

The boy stepped forward, towering over the chained woman as she weakly gasped for air. Her black eyes, once full of desperate hope, clouded with confusion as she finally realised that this boy wasn't going to save her.

"W-What…?" she whispered.

The woman barely had time to process what was happening before Noah's fingers wrapped around her throat.

Her body jerked violently as he lifted the woman off the ground by her neck even as the chains rattled against the walls.

Her legs kicked as she used her fingers to claw at his arm.

But?

It was a useless struggle.

I felt a chill crawl down my metaphorical spine.

I had seen Noah kill before.

But this?

This wasn't his usual self.

This wasn't just for survival.

This was a performance.

A cruel, merciless display of dominance.

And the worst part?

Noah looked like he was enjoying it.

The woman's breath came out in ragged gasps, her body twitching in panic. But Noah?

He just watched.

Calm. Unbothered.

Then, his hazel eyes began to glow.

A deep, suffocating darkness seeped into the air.

A force that made even my non-physical body feel like it was being dragged into an abyss.

And then—

He used it.

[Soul Siphoning – Activated.]

The moment the system alert rang in my head, the woman's screams turned to shrieks.

She convulsed violently as a misty, pale light began seeping from her eyes, mouth, and chest—her very soul being ripped away.

Noah's grip tightened.

His lips curled into a slow, sickening grin as the soul's essence flowed into him, his body absorbing it with a shudder of pleasure.

Of course, even though this was visible only to the 2 of us and for everyone else it only seemed like the boy was choking her neck, that did not make anything better.

Soon, the woman's shrieks turned into pitiful gasps.

Then, silence.

Her body slumped, lifeless, as the last remnants of her soul were devoured.

Noah held her there for a moment longer, as if relishing the quiet.

Then—without a second thought, he dropped her.

Her corpse hit the bloodstained floor with a silent thud.

I stared.

What. The. Actual. Fuck.

Noah exhaled slowly, rolling his shoulders as if shaking off some tension.

His golden eyes gleamed, a satisfied smirk still lingering on his lips.

"Ah…" he murmured, flexing his fingers. "That felt… nice."

Oh, shit.

I wanted to say something. Anything.

I wanted to grab him by the collar and shake him back to his senses.

But before I could—

The gods started speaking again.

[System Alert: You have received messages from multiple gods.]

[Minor War God: Hah! Finally, you're acting like a true warrior! Take my blessing, boy, and crush your enemies!]

[God of Trickery: Hehehe~ Interesting, interesting! So much potential! Wanna make a deal, kid?]

[Night Goddess: Hmph. I suppose I can acknowledge you now. Accept my gift.]

[God of Serpents: …Fated Villain. You are being plotted against.]

[God of Serpents: The leader of the evil organisation is on his way.]

***

The moment I saw the last message, my nonexistent heart stopped.

What?!

The leader?

I thought we still had time before someone truly dangerous noticed us.

But no.

Noah had gotten too bold.

And now?

The strongest assassin in this goddamn dungeon was coming for us.

I waited for Noah to react, expecting him to panic or retreat or at least be a little worried.

Instead—

He grinned.

A slow, excited grin stretched across his face, his golden eyes gleaming with madness.

"Oh?" He tilted his head, cracking his knuckles. "So he's finally here?"

He sounded thrilled.

I swore under my breath.

This wasn't good. This wasn't good at all.

[God of Serpents: Do not underestimate him. He is stronger than you.]

[God of Serpents: He will kill you.]

And then, before I could stop him—

Noah did something even dumber.

He challenged a god.

"Heh." The boy scoffed. "Kill me? No, no, no…"

His fingers curled into a fist, and he stared at the screen, his eyes wide.

Then, he looked up.

"I'll defeat him," he said, his voice calm and confident. "But I won't kill him."

I froze.

Oh, for fuck's sake.

Noah, you absolute maniac—

WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?!

The gods were silent for a long moment.

Then, finally—

[God of Serpents: You are either very foolish… or very arrogant.]

Noah just grinned wider.

[God of Serpents: …Very well.]

Oh, no. No, no, no, don't do this—

[God of Serpents: If you succeed, I will bestow upon you a gift that no god has yet offered to any human.]

FUCK.

I wanted to scream.

I wanted to reach through Noah's skull and shake him.

But it was already too late.

A golden sigil formed in the air, binding the deal.

Noah just laughed.

"Good," he murmured. "This will be fun."

I was losing my mind.

No, seriously.

How the hell was I supposed to fix this?!

Noah had just made a deal with a god.

Not only that—he had done it while being his most insane, reckless, borderline psychotic self.

And the worst part?

He had no idea he had a split personality.

I, as his system, knew.

I had seen it before.

Whenever he got too bold, too confident, too reckless…

This side of him surfaced…it had even surfaced many a times during the early 2 months after the God's had descended.

But after his fight with Pixie's father?

This was the first time he was appearing.

A side that wasn't afraid of anything.

A side that wasn't just playing a role.

A side that enjoyed the chaos.

And now?

This crazy bastard had locked himself into a death match with the strongest assassin in this entire underground organization.

And if he somehow won?

The Serpent God would give him something no other god had granted a human before.

I was so fucked.

And worse, I had to find a way to explain all this to Noah's normal, pussy blood phobic self…

…without telling him that he was, quite literally, insane.

Shit.

***