LGHTNOVELBOOK Chapter 91: Secret Promise_4
"I like you, Emerald Sparrow."
"I had always been unclear about the feeling of 'liking' someone. I only knew that I liked my mom, I didn't like my dad so much, I liked the magical girl on TV, I didn't like myself."
"But then, after I met you, I felt that I could clearly distinguish what this feeling was."
"Whenever I thought of that person, I felt a warm current flowing in my heart; whenever I saw that person, my heart felt elated; whenever we were together, I felt very calm inside; whenever our eyes met, I wished that moment would last longer."
"I wanted more of that person's attention, to become more important to them, to become closer, to monopolize, to...make you stay for me."
Lin Xiaolu closed her eyes, "Emerald Sparrow, you once said that after I become a fully capable magical girl, you would leave, right?"
"I did say, it depends on you, even if it's until retirement..."
"What if I said I wanted 'forever'?"
Emerald Sparrow was silent once again.
She could give as many false promises as needed, but in the face of her daughter, she couldn't lie.
Because whether it was Emerald Sparrow or Lin Yun, perhaps one day they both would leave her daughter's life.
And this silence brought another interpretation to Lin Xiaolu.
"Sorry...did I scare you?"
She took a small step back, restoring the original distance between them, "I'm sorry you had to see me like this...but, I felt that I could no longer hide or deceive myself."
"I can't be as clever as Xia Liang, nor as obedient as Bai Jingxuan. Every time I saw you interacting with them, I felt an uncontrollable jealousy."
"I also want to be close to you as naturally as Xia Liang, and to express my affection as unrestrainedly as Bai Jingxuan. I want to be like them...no, I want to be favored more than them."
"But I'm also really afraid that I'm just deluding myself, especially when, as a senior, you've already done so much for me. If I, as a junior, still shamelessly cling to you, it really seems too annoying."
At that, she pursed her lips, "Although it seems I'm already shameless enough now."
"Rather than continue to fantasize every day, letting the feelings of jealousy disperse, I think it's better to just speak up and tell you all these thoughts."
"If you agree, that would be best. If you find me annoying and dislike this, then I can certainly adjust my position..."
—"Lulu."
Emerald Sparrow's words interrupted Lin Xiaolu's increasingly rapid speech.
She didn't say much, but just those two words made Lin Xiaolu, whose thoughts were like a derailed train, stop her wild imaginations and stare blankly at Emerald Sparrow.
"Ying used to call you that, right?"
Emerald Sparrow sighed, slowly raised her hands, then spread them to her sides, "Stop your wild thoughts, come here."
"Really?" Lin Xiaolu asked earnestly.
"If you don't come, I'm putting my hands down," Emerald Sparrow's eyelids drooped.
No sooner had she finished speaking than Lin Xiaolu stepped forward and gave her a fierce hug.
The embrace was strong, but only considered strong for a fourteen-year-old girl. For Emerald Sparrow, who maintained a magical girl's body, it was almost effortless.
The two held each other, just holding each other, without any superfluous words, because the hug was enough to convey all emotions.
"I will leave, sooner or later, I will go."
After a long while, Emerald Sparrow spoke, "I did tell you that I could wait until you retire, but actually, I don't even know if I can wait that long."
"Hmm," Lin Xiaolu's chin rested on Emerald Sparrow's shoulder, responding softly.
"But, if that day, you have become a capable magical girl, then, you can choose to follow me, to go with me."
Emerald Sparrow's voice was equally soft, "I won't stop you, nor do I have the right to stop you, because no one can stop a fully capable magical girl."
"Hmm," Lin Xiaolu's exhale was a bit heavier.
"And until then..."
Emerald Sparrow paused for a moment, as if making some resolution:
—"If you want, no matter who you think I am, feel free to act spoiled," she concluded.