The Villain Wants to Change Genres

Chapter 19

“There’s no space for Luwen in the carriage. I made a promise to him, so I feel uneasy about leaving him behind. I’m thinking of postponing it today and going with Luwen in a few days.”

“He can ride with us.”

“But Father…”

“To think you’d consider breaking your promise with the Prince because of a promise to Luwen. You really cherish that child.”

Irene looked at me with deep eyes. Her expression of approval was a bit embarrassing, but she’s two years older than me, so it’s understandable. It would be troublesome if she didn’t find me endearing…

“He’s good and cute.”

“Right? At first, he was so dirty. Roana complained that no matter how much she washed him, the dirty water kept coming out. But when he was all cleaned up, the child was so pretty.”

Irene must be recalling when Luwen was first brought in. She covered her mouth and burst out laughing. If only I had met Luwen then. How nice it would have been if I had realized my past life earlier.

Feeling regretful, I turned around. Luwen was standing still as I had instructed, staring this way. For a moment, I felt like our eyes met. Even though I knew Luwen wouldn’t be looking at me with Irene in view, I just had that feeling.

Still, I’m glad I realized it before it was too late.

“Leave Luwen to me. I’ll talk to Father about it.”

“Really? Can I ask that of you?”

“Of course.”

Irene puffed out her chest with a confident face. Her smile, full of the unique confidence of someone assured of affection, was so bright and pretty. My smile probably looks shabby in comparison to hers.

It’s the same with jewels. Real and fake differ from the color. However, a well-made fake can fool many people. I put on an elaborately crafted, brilliant fake smile.

“Thank you, sister.”

“Mmhmm!”

Her smile deepened even more, and suddenly Irene hugged me tightly and patted my back.

…What is she doing?

“Don’t worry. I’ll do everything you want, Fei.”

Should I thank her again? Something about this timing feels off, making me uneasy. And why is she suddenly hugging me and patting my back? As if she’s comforting me. It’s strange.

“Why?”

I could have just pretended not to know anything, pretended to be touched once more and thanked her, but I couldn’t help but ask. Having heard incomprehensible actions and words, I needed to know the reason.

“Hmm. I’m not sure. I just want to do everything for you, Fei. When I look at you, I feel sad for some reason. I want you to be happy.”

What is this now? It’s still unsettling. Is Irene’s affection for ‘family’ greater than what was described in the novel?

There can be differences between reality and fiction. But concluding that didn’t sit right with me.

“It’s a bit embarrassing. Hehe. I’ll go fetch Father quickly. Ah! Or should we go together?”

“No. I’d rather…”

“I’m sure Father loves you too.”

Holding my hand and smiling gently, Irene looked like a dreaming girl.

“But since you seem uncomfortable, I’ll go quickly and come back.”

“Okay. Thanks.”

Well. She might not know that there are parents in this world who genuinely hate their own children.

No matter how hard you try, you can’t be loved by such people. I know it’s much better to give up. Then at least my heart can be at ease.

‘Mom is sorry… I just can’t do it, you’re horrible. I can’t love you…’

My heart sank at the tearful voice that suddenly came to mind. Why doesn’t this person’s voice fade? To think I’d recall it even after being reborn.

After seeing Irene off, I touched my face to check if I was smiling properly before turning around. Luwen was standing there, looking at me. This time it’s not a misconception since Irene isn’t here. Our eyes definitely met.

Feeling my mind clear at that straight gaze, I walked towards the child with large strides. Luwen is an amazing child just by existing. It was the first time my heart felt at ease so quickly after thinking of that person.

* * *

Irene successfully completed her mission. Thanks to her, the four-person carriage was full. Father and Irene sat side by side, and opposite them sat Luwen and me.

Luwen was so tense that he didn’t sway at all even though his feet didn’t touch the floor. The small fists on his thighs showed protruding knuckles.

‘How much strength is he using?’

As much as I wanted to soothe the child and help him relax… the atmosphere in the carriage was heavy. I thought Irene would lead with her characteristic bright energy, but I don’t know why it’s so quiet. Only the rattling sound of the carriage filled the air.

‘If I speak to Luwen in this situation, it will inevitably catch Father’s attention.’

How much more tense would Luwen become if he received Father’s gaze? Moreover, I was a bit sensitive because Father’s gaze had been brushing past me since earlier.

Thinking it might be better not to look at either side, I turned my head towards the window. But that didn’t last long, as Father finally called my name.

“Fei.”

Why. Why are you calling me? Don’t call me. What are you trying to say to me here? If you humiliate me in front of Luwen, I won’t stand still… No, calm down. Wouldn’t it be okay to endure some level of humiliation? Then Luwen would sympathize with me.

Yes. Whether it’s sympathy or pity, it doesn’t matter. If it becomes a reason for the child to take interest in me, it doesn’t seem bad at all.

“Yes, Father.”

“I heard you’ve been interested in medicine recently.”

I reflexively looked at Irene. She nodded slightly with sparkling eyes.

It seems Irene didn’t just talk to Father about Luwen. Did she ask him to say something kind to me?

“Yes. Since I have no talent with the sword, I’m trying to pursue a different path.”

“Are you not interested in the Duke’s position?”

Testing me, are you? I’m no longer interested in such things, so you don’t need to be wary of me.

But being asked like this made me want to sneer at the twisted mindset I had carefully hidden. Isn’t Irene your only child anyway? What does my intention matter? Or is my very existence a hindrance?

“I no longer have any interest. You don’t need to worry about me.”

However, revealing one’s true feelings is amateur. I smiled calmly and looked straight into Father’s eyes. Think I’m only disinterested in the Duke’s position? I’m not interested in your affection and love either. I was no longer the weak child trembling and craving Father’s attention.

“Your eyes have improved.”

“Is that so?”

“If you want to study at the Academy, I’ll make it possible.”

Is this a test? Do you want to confirm whether I’m really not interested in the Duke’s position, or if I’m just pretending not to be interested? Either way, it was a beneficial situation for me. Even so, I had no intention of attending the Academy and leaving Luwen behind. It’s a boarding school, after all.

“Thank you. I’m not sure if you’re aware, but I’m not in the best health, so the Academy might be difficult for me. Instead, could you arrange for me to have Count Rodiahim or Duke Sujena as my mentor?”

Forget about the Academy talk and get me a medical authority as a mentor instead. If I can’t avoid the test anyway, let me milk it a bit. What’s so good about being a Duke? You have all the power and authority.

“I’ll look into it.”

“Yes. Thank you. If you could just help me with this, I don’t think I’ll have anything else to ask of you in the future, Father. I’ll live as you wish.”

I added an unnecessary comment, feeling like I needed to say something more to feel better. All while wearing a smile that should look refreshed.

The principled Duke isn’t someone who would change a promise made in front of Irene. The meaning that the punishment you gave me has now become a reward for me should have been clearly conveyed.

To emphasize how pleased I was, I hummed faintly as I opened the window. Cold wind rushed into the carriage. Actually, I really did feel better. The relationship that had been one-sidedly cut off had now become mutual.

Father was the one who cut me off first. He declared that he wouldn’t receive my morning greetings, and said I didn’t have to join for meals. He made it sound like I had a choice, but it was essentially telling me not to come.

I heard those words exactly three years ago. The day Irene brought Luwen, and when Dedric told Father I had no talent for swordsmanship.

That’s probably why I was so harsh to Luwen. It was very easy to turn despair into anger, and even easier to take it out on others.

‘What a worthless guy.’

That’s the kind of person I was. It’s like spitting while lying down, but I can’t help but curse at my past self.