LGHTNOVELBOOK Chapter 99
Chapter 99 Mama, Uuu~ 2
Shia laughed.
“Hehe, I caught a lot!”
Shia, with her bright smile, was the very image of a saint.
A saintly smile.
A holy aura.
She embodied pure innocence itself.
She looked benevolent like a saint, yet at the same time, she was as innocent as a child.
She seemed to sway gently, like reeds bathed in sunlight, but was stronger and more resilient than an ancient tree where woodpeckers nested.
For any man… no, for any human, it would be perfectly natural for their heart to race if they saw Shia’s saintly smile even once.
Bzzz bzzz
Whirrrrr
Buuuuuung
Flap flap
-Is that… a saint?
-Holy crap, lolol that’s our leader!
-I get dizzy every time I see her, lololol
-Where did the saint go?
-This is also the saint, deal with it!
-Hahaha, what the hell, lol
And whenever Shia smiled, the viewers who watched her also smiled.
Were they laughing because it was funny?
No, they were laughing because they were dumbfounded.
The 125 tentacles summoned by the miracle of Holy Body Descent spread out like a giant flower, grabbing massive corn crane flies, each over a meter long.
The sight was reminiscent of hundreds of pieces of meat hanging in a slaughterhouse.
How could anyone not laugh when they saw this?
“Heeheehee. I caught a lot. What do you think? Looks delicious, right?”
-Huh?
-?
-Are you insane?
-What the hell…
[‘Duck-Billed Platypus Smoked Meat’ donated 3,000 won!]
ㄴAre you serious?
“Yep, totally serious…”
-Hahaha, she’s gone nuts, lol
-The saint doesn’t lie, lol
Regardless of whether the viewers freaked out or whether the chat room was on fire, Shia calmly sat down in her spot.
If they were in another area, they could use wood or grass for firewood, but since this was a jungle dungeon filled with moisture, they had to bring their own firewood.
Now that the fire was lit, the only thing left was to raise the temperature of the oil.
Shia, during her broadcasts, had fried Centipede Dragons before.
Recently, she had even made fried chicken using a Crazy Red Chicken.
Frying itself wasn’t a particularly difficult cooking method, so as long as you paid attention to the mixture of the batter, there was little chance of failure, and it was a simple yet delicious dish.
Of course, preparing large amounts of oil and a frying pot wasn’t easy, but Shia had earned plenty of money balancing both her broadcast and hunter life, so it wasn’t a big deal.
‘Back when I first returned, I spent all my support funds, got scolded by Yeonhwa, and couldn’t even pay at the blood sausage soup restaurant…’
Back then, she had overspent.
In that sense, she was looking forward to the fried corn crane flies this time.
Though, to be honest, they did look like an eye-offending insect.
The appearance was a giant mosquito—an insect horrifying in human life—blown up to a meter in size.
However, an interview with a hunter who had eaten these corn crane flies claimed that they tasted like corn even when eaten raw, making them a great source of protein. This immediately piqued Shia’s interest, prompting her to come here.
Corn-flavored crane flies?
And they’re a meter long?
And there’s a lot of them?
How could she resist?
-Seriously, if you wanted corn, wouldn’t you just go to a restaurant and ask for corn cheese? Why would you come all the way to catch crane flies, you crazy woman?
-Crazy woman… crazy woman…
-Hahahahaha, am I the crazy one? Am I hearing things?
-Bzzt, you’re perfectly sane.
-Info: The leader is a crazy woman who fried Centipede Dragons during her first broadcast.
-No, seriously, you dumb girl. There are so many other things to eat there besides crane flies, lololol
“Hey now, don’t be like that. I told you it’s delicious!”
-Kya, what a crazy broadcast…
-I watch Noona’s stream just for this kind of madness…
The corn crane flies, being a meter long, had enormous wings and mouths for eating.
Normally, crane flies had mouths for sucking plant sap or nectar, but these corn crane flies lived by sucking the starch or sap of dungeon-grown corn, which gave them their corn flavor.
Though their danger level hadn’t been properly assessed, they were known to be extremely docile, but make no mistake, they were still monsters, not just simple animals or insects.
They held mana within their bodies, which made them exceptionally clean and free from bacteria or germs, possessing surprisingly pure flesh.
Nom nom
“Tasty?”
Nod.
-No way, is this Noona talking to the tentacles?
-Nah, it’s probably a one-person play.
Surprisingly, when Shia asked the tentacle that had crushed and eaten a crane fly’s body, it nodded, indicating the taste was quite good.
Although my taste and the tentacles’ might differ, if it nodded like that, it meant it would likely taste good to me as well.
“Alright, since everything’s set up.”
One of the tentacles brought a crane fly in front of Shia.
-Stoppppppppp
-Ew, the visuals, damn it, lololol
-How can anyone eat that?
-Eeeewwwww
-Gag
-Yuck
-Are you really gonna eat that?
Visuals?
It’s a crane fly.
A big crane fly.
A freaking big crane fly.
The corn crane fly died instantly the moment it was struck by a tentacle filled with holy power and overwhelming strength, but its legs still twitched slightly, which only added to its grotesque visuals, making anyone feel nauseous.
Hmm, on closer inspection, not all the crane flies’ bodies were intact.
Since their bodies were inherently fragile, if the tentacles grabbed the crane flies with even slightly too much force, their bodies shattered into pieces.
It seemed like over 100 crane flies had been caught, but only about 30 were intact enough to be edible.
That’s fine.
Even so, this number should be just right.
First of all…
[Miracle – Purification]
-Phew, soothing…
-Peaceful…
-Peace…
-If she hadn’t used that, I would have left.
Although monsters with mana inside them generally weren’t that dirty, since they were insect-like monsters, the purification miracle was essential.
At least for the sake of the viewers watching the broadcast, if not for Shia herself.
“Alright, let’s get rid of these annoying wings and legs.”
-The wings and legs look inedible anyway.
-Not that the rest looks any more appetizing.
Honestly, the visuals were too horrific, so I decided to remove not just the eyes and the mouth but the entire head as well.
After all, there were plenty of corn crane flies to work with. It would be easier to coat the elongated body in batter and munch it down in one go, like a skewer.
Great. Now that the ingredients were ready…!
“Okay, let’s start cooking!”
Crunch!
-Ew, gross!
-Aaahhh!
-I can’t watch this anymore!
-This is as far as I go…
-I’m dropping out, damn it!
-Don’t do it, stop!
[‘I Sell Fried Maple Leaves’ donated 15,000 won!]
ㄴYou scaredy-cats, lolol. Can’t handle a little gross stuff, huh?
-?
-This guy’s provoking everyone, lol.
-How dare you call me scared?
-Haha, I’m watching this till the end, lol.
-It’s not “call me scared,” it’s “shout that I’m scared.”
-The grammar Nazi has arrived.
And so, Shia began by removing the arms, legs, wings, and head from the first crane fly, leaving the plump, elongated body to dip into the frying batter.
-Still, once it’s coated in batter, it kinda looks like a skewer or fried fish cake?
-Yeah, but it’s still a crane fly.
-Hahaha.
-I just got here, what is that? It actually looks tasty.
-?
-Haha.
-Shh.
-Shh.
-Be quiet, lol.
-No, seriously, what is that?
-You’ll know when you see it, lol.
“Hey~ You’re asking what this is? It’s super delicious! I haven’t tasted it yet, but doesn’t it look tasty already?”
-Haha…
-Lol, this kid, haha.
Shia continued removing the arms, wings, and heads from the rest of the crane flies.
-???
-What the hell is that, lol?
-Ahahaha!
-Newcomers can’t handle it, huh?
Of course, the new viewers couldn’t wrap their heads around the bizarre ingredients.
But whether they were confused or not, Shia continued her work.
She drained the green blood from the corn crane flies’ bodies, removed the wings, legs, and heads, and then dunked the elongated bodies into the frying batter.
Good, good.
Everything’s going smoothly.
“Oh, is the oil temperature just right?”
Sizzle!
Shia tested the oil temperature with her bare hand.
Since she was still prepping the ingredients, she thought it would be faster to check the oil’s heat by putting her hand directly in it.
-Holy crap, I freaked out!
-I thought the streamer was going to fry her own hand for a second!
-Hahaha.
Most of the viewers knew that the streamer had an incredible physical build, so the regulars weren’t that shocked, leaving only the newcomers feeling flustered.
Okay. The oil temperature is just right…
Just one last gnat to handle, and it’s done.
“Hmm, it’s ready.”
I adjusted the oil temperature to about 180 degrees. I even bought a giant assembly-line deep fryer for moments like this.
“Alright, I’ll throw them all in at once now.”
-Let’s gooo
-Whoa
-I wonder what it’ll taste like
Shia coated the 30 corn gnat bodies she had prepared in batter and began dropping them into the oil.
Sizzleee!
Ah, that sound is delicious.
When I made chicken from the Crazy Red Chicken last time, I felt the same way, but the sound of the batter sizzling in the oil is comparable to an orchestra’s music.
For the centipede dragon, I think I fried it for about 3 minutes in total… This should take about 2 minutes.
Sluuurp….
-LOL, the streamer is genuinely looking forward to this
-Look at her drooling LOL
-This is definitely going to be clip-worthy
[‘KawaiiHorned’ donated 50,000 won!]
If you eat all that, I’ll add another 100,000.
“Oh, slurp. Of course, I’ll take it. If someone’s giving me free money, why refuse?”
-Is this the Money-grubber Saintess?
-The Fundraiser Saintess LOL
-Excuse me, is it normal for saintesses these days to love money and fry bugs?
-LOLOLOL
-Oh right, she’s the Saintess LOL
Why would I refuse free money?
I may be a saintess, but that doesn’t mean I hate money!
Ding!
At that moment, the alarm signaling 2 minutes rang out from the drone.
Alright, time to take them out.
-Why does that actually look tasty, it’s pissing me off
-It looks like Busan fishcake tempura
-If I didn’t know the ingredients, I’d probably just eat it because of the batter LOL
Great. The visuals are spot on.
Honestly, these long, crispy fried pieces look even more appetizing than the chicken I made from the Crazy Red Chicken.
Now then…
“Let’s dig in! Haup…”
Crunch
Crunch crunch
Chew
Nom nom…
“………”
-?
-Why does the streamer look like that?
-What’s going on?
-Is it bad?
-I knew this would happen LOL
“No, no… it’s not that it’s bad… but what is this?”
It was exactly that.
It wasn’t that it tasted bad.
The golden, crispy tempura was taken out at the perfect time, preserving both its texture and warmth.
It was a textbook example of tempura.
“But… why can’t I taste anything?”
-?
-??
-?
-What do you mean?
-Are you saying it’s flavorless?
No, it’s not completely tasteless.
What I meant was, I can only taste the batter.
I went through all the trouble of frying corn gnats, so I should be able to taste the gnats, not just the batter, right?
Chew chew
“Umm… gulp, it’s weird.”
Even after trying it again, it was the same.
I thought maybe it was just one, but all the tempura were the same.
Why? What’s happening?
-LOL there’s literally nothing inside the tempura
-Huh?
-Are you serious? LOL
-LOLOLOL
“What?”
At that moment, prompted by a viewer’s comment, I split one of the tempura in half.
Inside the golden, crispy tempura shell…
“Huh…”
-What’s going on? LOL
-Why is there nothing inside??
-Didn’t the streamer definitely put gnat bodies in there?
There was nothing inside.
If I had put something in before frying, there should have been gnat meat or at least the body inside, but the tempura was just an empty, crispy shell.
“….What… is this?”
-LOLOLOL
-Why is there nothing inside??
-LOL she’s laughing so hard she had to donate
[‘Tsunomaki Lamb’ donated 50,000 won!]
Just found out corn gnats have a heat tolerance of 60 degrees max. So they evaporated the moment you dunked them in the oil LOL.
-60 degrees??
-LOLOLOL
-LOLOLOLOL
“…Heat tolerance?”
At those words, Shia’s face froze.
She stood there, as if turned to stone, genuinely shocked.
No, no way…
Cautiously, Shia picked up one of the heads she had removed earlier while cleaning the gnats.
She placed it into the oil, still holding steady at 180 degrees.
Sizzleeeee!
-?
-Where did the head go?
-LOL
-So that’s what they meant by heat tolerance LOL
-LOLOLOL
-Oh, the gnats really evaporated LOL
-LOL
-They actually vanished LOL
What… what the…
In short, the corn gnats that Shia had painstakingly hunted and prepared… were so fragile and heat-sensitive that the moment they touched the 180-degree oil, they completely disintegrated, evaporating as if they’d been obliterated.
If I had put them in one by one and checked the results, I might have been able to save the other ingredients.
But by tossing in all 30 gnats at once, all I ended up with were long, crispy tempura shells.
Realizing this, Shia’s face rapidly fell into despair.
“…Ah…”
-LOLOLOL
-LOL
-LOLOLOL
-LOL I laughed out loud at work and now everyone’s staring LOL
-But how can you not laugh at this LOL
Look at that devastated face.
After all that effort, in the end, there’s a kid who didn’t get to eat.
Can that saintess even understand the feeling of hunger?
That’s why she’s the Antics Saintess.
“………..”
And with a look of utter defeat, Shia operated the drone camera.
[Broadcast Ended]
-?
-??
-??
-What the?
-She rage-quit LOL
-LOL
-The saintess rage-quit LOL
-Where are you going, where are you going, where are you going, where are you going, where are you going, where are you going, where are you going
Even after being cast into the dark void, the netizens and followers still remained in Shia’s channel, noisily chattering away.
And that day, the clip collection of Shia’s failed corn gnat tempura received 3 skulls on the Hunter Genre Gallery.
○○○
“Hee-ing…”
Shia whimpered sadly, holding back her sorrow as she cleaned up the cooking ingredients and oil.
I was really looking forward to the corn gnats…
Sniff sniff…
I mean, how was I supposed to know their heat tolerance was only 60 degrees… If I had known, I would’ve done more research.
“Hey, excuse me!”
“……”
Who is it?
I just failed to fry my corn gnats, so I’m a very disappointed Saintess of the Dead.
Please don’t talk to me…
“Hey! Miss, no, young lady!”
“….”
At that moment, a group of people approached me.
Are they hunters?
Judging by their equipment, they certainly look like hunters.
“Miss, I have something to ask you. Did you catch all the corn gnats around here?”
“….Yes.”
“Sigh, well… we’re in trouble now.”
What?
Is this a big problem?
“Look, young lady. There’s such a thing as hunter ethics. This was originally our spot, you know.”
“What…?”
At the hunter’s sudden claim of ‘this being their spot,’ I instinctively tilted my head in confusion.
Their spot? What do you mean, ‘your spot’?
Are you talking about something like a hunting ground in a game where someone says, ‘This is my spot’?
But this isn’t a game.
In reality, dungeons rarely have private property recognized, especially when it comes to monsters. The rule is usually ‘first come, first served.’
So why are you suddenly complaining about spots? What am I supposed to do?
“Look, miss. You seem new around here. Is this your first time in this area?”
“Uh…”
“Sigh, stop stuttering and answer clearly.”
Since I didn’t respond, the other men started to look more and more annoyed.
Well… I guess it’s understandable.
I should try to be patient.
After all, I thought I’d become somewhat famous, at least enough to have a small following on the Hunter Gallery, but these people seemed completely unaware of me.
Their mana didn’t seem particularly high, so they were probably C or D rank hunters. Given that, they likely lived harsh lives, day-to-day, like laborers or temp workers. It wouldn’t be surprising if they didn’t even know I existed, let alone my broadcast.
Yes, these are tough people… I should be understanding.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know this was your spot.”
“No…! Jeez…”
“Damn it, I was supposed to buy my daughter a birthday present…”
“Sigh.”
Seeing their genuinely disappointed faces, I realized how much they relied on hunting these corn gnats.
I don’t know how deep this hunter world goes, but… it seems incredibly difficult for them.
“I’m really sorry. It won’t happen again…”
“No, young lady! Do you think an apology is enough?”
“You just ruined a man’s entire day’s earnings and…!”
“Guys, stop it. Yelling won’t change anything.”
At that moment, a girl who looked quite young stepped forward to calm the hunters down.
“Sigh, our guild leader was already giving us hell for not catching enough…”
“I’ll take care of it. You guys go ahead.”
“Sigh.”
“Miss, just please don’t let this happen again, okay?”
Ugh, I have nothing to say.
If these corn gnats were their whole day’s earnings, then I really caused them a huge inconvenience.
For me, it was just a casual cooking show, a bit of fun, but for them, it was their livelihood for the day.
The hunter world is narrower and harsher than I thought.
“If I need to compensate you, I’ll gladly do it.”
“No, no. That’s not why we came to talk to you, so don’t worry.”
I was willing to help out, even if it meant doing so personally.
After all, I have plenty of strength, stamina, and money to spare.
“Sorry about earlier. But those guys are just really worn out, busting their asses to support their families. They didn’t mean any harm, so try to understand. Gulp.”
The girl who spoke drained the chocolate milk in her hand.
She looked really young, even for a hunter.
She was probably younger than Yeonhwa.
At most, she might’ve been a high schooler.
“Gulp… Whew, anyway, you’re new here, right? Can we talk for a bit?”
She extended her hand.
I took her hand as well.
“Yes, my name is…”
[Son~]
“……!!?!”
The moment I grasped her hand, I was suddenly struck by a piercing image in my mind, causing me to instinctively let go.
What was that just now?
That voice… it’s familiar. What is this…?
“You scared me. What’s wrong, sis?”
“……….”
“..Uh, uh…”
Son. Son. Son. Son. Son…?
What was that just now? What the…
No, it can’t be… No way…
No way…
“…Mom…?”