Chapter 11: 11 - Pants Down, SAN Down
---Logan's POV---
Although the three of us looked to be the same age physically, I just felt that Garble seemed a bit older than ProGamer_Daddy and me.
How should I put it... he had a vibe of having experienced the ups and downs of life.
He nodded. "I have no objections."
"You can call me ProGamer_Daddy. I came here because the introduction said this was a western fantasy game where I could learn magic." ProGamer_Daddy introduced himself. "Can't wait to start throwing fireballs!"
I laughed heartily and introduced myself again. "I'm a gaming content creator; my ID and in-game ID are the same, NeverShowOff. Feel free to follow me!"
Garble nodded, and asked. "Speaking of magic, we all heard the opening story, right? What do you guys think of the game's background and the faction NPCs?"
"Didn't expect you to be a story-driven player?" I was slightly surprised.
From his quiet and tough demeanor, I thought he would skip all the storylines and focus on hardcore, no-death runs to beat the game.
Garble stared at the peeling church walls and said after a while. "I'm just a little curious. After all, this game is really well made—it's like... another world."
ProGamer_Daddy stepped closer to one of the walls, examining the weathered stone. "I'll admit that. The level of detail in this game is really impressive! Every bit of damage in this church is unique, as if it had been abandoned for years! Look at these cracks!"
I lowered my head in thought. This question triggered my occupational instincts as a gaming content creator. The words from Viktor earlier played in my mind like a movie.
"It seems we players are a group of natives who left and then returned to the continent of Aeltia. Our purpose is to stop a vague prophecy?"
"The faction leader, Viktor, was one of the first to return, but his mission failed, and the prophecy came true."
"The organization he established to stop the prophecy—The Watchers—has only two members left, so we're the second wave of returnees?"
It was the typical "players-as-saviors" plot, with plenty of mysteries laid out for future developments.
For example, what was the prophecy?
Why did the Viktor fail? And even the history of The Watchers' creation... These could all serve as the main storyline moving forward.
"But the remaining faction members are pretty odd," ProGamer_Daddy continued, moving away from the wall to join our discussion. "There's a glowing orb tied to the God of Light, a knight who also seems aligned with the divine camp, and then our faction leader is an undead? It's all pretty contradictory!"
I hushed him, glancing nervously at the shadows. "Careful, don't let our faction leader hear you, or he'll think you're badmouthing him! These walls might have ears..."
But indeed, there were many suspicious points. With so little information, we couldn't analyze any major clues. The only possible lead was that we might soon encounter a Magic Tide storyline?
But apart from the name, we knew absolutely nothing.
I took one last look at the dilapidated church and then headed out with the group to do quests.
Storyline? Leveling up and learning magic was far more tempting now!
---Viktor's POV---
Not long after the three left, I stepped out from behind the statue with Edgar and Luminaris. I was satisfied as I looked at where the three had just stood.
"Excellent, everything is progressing according to plan."
No wonder the gods always loved to be cryptic and mysterious. It turned out that saying half a sentence and leaving others to guess was this satisfying!
The game interface had been created using my divine power, with the same principles as my fake system panel. It was like a floating notepad in front of the players' chests. All its contents were personally typed in by me after receiving the three players' registration information.
When they obtained quest items, I had also been hiding in the dark, remotely adding those items to their "game interface" myself. All of this was to thoroughly fool the three of them.
Although Luminaris had lost most of a god's authority, his divine power still carried that "deceptive quality" unique to the God of Creativity. This divine power was more prone to transformation than regular godly energy.
As long as the three truly believed that this "high-tech notepad" could record player information, it wouldn't take long for it to actually become a real game interface.
Such was the toxicity of faith-based power.
That's why I chose Luminaris as the medium, akin to a central game server. Divine power came from him to create the game interface, so the resulting faith-based power would naturally flow back.
A self-aware divine essence—the new god I intended to cultivate!
Edgar frowned as he listened to the loud shouting from the three outside, clearly marveling at the scenery.
"Viktor, your world doesn't even have forests or abandoned towns?"
"Not quite the same," I chuckled. "You could think of it as their hobby."
"Some people aren't willing to go outside and enjoy the view, but in a game, even a dancing chicken can make them stop and watch for hours. They'll even willingly do some menial tasks because of it."
Edgar looked serious: "A value system I completely don't understand."
"They stop to admire everything... even mundane things," he added, shaking his head.
"In their world, virtual experiences hold special value," I explained, watching the three players through a crack in the wall.
"But what's so interesting about a dancing chicken? And that experience value you added to the game interface. It's clearly just a meaningless number, so why does it motivate everyone so much?"
Edgar had seen it clearly.
Before I even announced that they'd level up to 2, the three of them were already eagerly tapping on the quest acceptance screen. The invisible game interface, hidden from the players' perspective, was fully visible to me and Edgar.
"I even believe that if you raised the threshold for learning magic to Level 5, their enthusiasm wouldn't noticeably drop."
I shook my head. "No, you're wrong. New player rewards aren't just benefits; they're an important retention tool. Without letting players experience the fun of magic, they'd never stick around!"
"Magic needs to be accessible early. Think of it as a taste test," I continued, watching their excited faces through the crack. "Without some early rewards, they'll never tackle the harder aspects."
The first magic spell was already part of my plan. Learning magic wasn't simple—it was as deep as advanced physics. Without dangling a few carrots, players would be shouting, 'What a trash game!' and leaving in droves.
Otherwise, they'd simply stagnate in the newbie village and refuse to touch the magic skill line.
That would ruin my plan. So ensuring a good player experience was one of my top priorities.
Edgar asked again, "Do they truly believe that learning magic is easy?"
No sane child of Aeltia would ever think so.
Human magical talent couldn't compare to winged beings or dragons. Only one in a thousand had even low-level magical potential. And even among those, few could truly walk the path of magic and grasp its mysteries.
For humans, magical talent tests at the age of six determined everything. Anyone with potential could rise in status, lifting their entire family with them. This showed just how hard learning magic truly was.
I coughed awkwardly. "Well, more or less. For them, magic only exists in games or stories. Games and stories serve the nerds, so of course, everyone has to experience the joy of magic. So in games or storylines, magic becomes something everyone can learn, making it seem simple."
Edgar remained silent for a long time, watching the retreating figures of the players through the broken window. Then finally said, "Is their place different because hardly anyone can use magic there? Is it because of the lack of magic that they have the prosperity you described to me?"
I froze for a moment, then shook my head.
"No, there's nothing wrong with magic itself. The problem lies in the way you are using it."
The reason was too complicated to explain.
For a local person raised with the worldview of Aeltia, it would sound more like telling a story.
"Once more nerds come to Aeltia in the future, you'll naturally find new answers."
That was all I could say.
Luminaris sat on the edge of the goddess statue's pedestal and pouted after hearing this, his tiny form making the gesture almost comical.
"What kind of prosperous alternate world is this? The humans it produces act so bizarrely, and you still think another world is better?"
I grabbed Luminaris by his tiny, pinky-sized foot and lifted him up, watching his round form dangle helplessly.
"If you keep talking nonsense, I'll turn you into a goddess statue!"
I made sure my voice carried plenty of danger.
Luminaris shuddered all over, his glow dimming slightly.
"You promised that I would only act as the game's symbolic totem, and you wouldn't touch my main body!"
Based on his reaction, he's terrified of becoming a goddess. He must think I'm going back on my word.
The way his light flickered and his form trembled, it was clear he'd rather endure the backlash of his new divine essence than that fate.
"Everyone knows that dark magicians' words don't count," I said with a grin, enjoying his panic.
"!!!"
Ignoring his expression, which looked as if the world had collapsed, I tossed him upwards. He landed perfectly in the hands of the goddess statue, which were cupped as if holding water.
"Having an antique around is a hassle. Since you're just a mascot anyway, you might as well stay in the church."
"Remember the key words I gave you. Teach the first spell to players who meet the conditions. If you can't even handle such a simple task, you might as well give up your extra brain cells."
Luminaris's round body shrank back slightly, muttering softly. "You always use this to threaten me..."
"Hmm?" I raised an eyebrow.
He instantly fell silent, his glow dimming to barely a flicker.
I withdrew my gaze, feeling quite satisfied. At last, I had pushed off the task of unlocking players' skill points. One less thing to worry about—so comfortable.
"Let's go out and take a look."
I really couldn't rest easy letting those three players roam outside unsupervised. I had a nagging feeling they would cause some kind of trouble.
If they died and had to be revived with a new body, the magic materials required were extremely expensive. The organization was short on funds right now, so they'd better behave themselves.
---
Outside the church, nothing much had changed. The only noticeable difference from when we went in was that the mud on the ground had been smoothed out.
There were also a few dark handprints on the church walls. Hmm... and a bite mark. What have these idiots been doing?
Noises came from the northeast side of the church. Edgar and I hurried over, the sounds of chaos growing louder with each step.
Turning a corner, we saw a player, ProGamer_Daddy, with more strangulation marks on his neck running down the street, holding the "beginner's gear" Edgar had specifically found for them.
The marks looked fresh, probably self-inflicted from testing damage mechanics.
He sprinted toward NeverShowOff, free as the wind.
"Bro, stop eating dirt and look! This game doesn't have censorship!"
NeverShowOff turned around when he heard the voice. Then he spat out the dirt in his mouth, bits of grass still stuck to his teeth.
"Bleh! Damn, it's true!"
He immediately threw away the unknown wild grass in his hands. With a "swish," his pants fell to the ground.
Staring at his lower half, which hadn't been covered by any holy light, his eyes were full of admiration.
"This game really gives us the good stuff!"
"Ahahaha, look at this!"
NeverShowOff also joined the streaking spree, running around like a headless chicken.
I silently crushed a piece of the wall next to me, the stone crumbling between my fingers.
If I had known players would lack this much restraint, I should have physically castrated them right from the start!
Or figured out a way to install some sort of eyes that would automatically shine holy light when they looked below the waist.
I pressed my palm against my forehead in frustration. It was my fault.
My fault for originally researching necromancy resurrection magic and designing human bodies based on my original standards. When it was converted into the byproduct magic of Flesh Rebirth, this particular trait was retained.
It wasn't even a defective gene; it wouldn't be excluded when marked by the divine traits.
That's why these two brats were now enjoying the benefits.
How embarrassing...
After a long silence, Edgar finally spoke, his tone complex and awkward.
"You said if I hear something incomprehensible, I should pretend I didn't hear it. For this incomprehensible insolence... should I pretend I didn't see it either?"
Alright, now I felt like my dignity had been completely thrown away. I should never have admitted I came from the same place as these nerds!
"No need." I dropped my hand. "Within the basic bounds of decency, we don't need to show them too much tolerance."
"In cases like this, let me teach you how to handle it."
I quickly opened my game panel.
Aside from players, I had equipped panels for myself, Edgar, and Luminaris. However, my identity included GM administrator privileges, while the other two only had NPC panels.
I swiftly operated on my panel.
The next second, NeverShowOff and ProGamer_Daddy's game panels popped up simultaneously.
[Warning: Due to your inappropriate actions, SAN value decreased by 1!]
[Warning: Due to your inappropriate actions, SAN value decreased by 1!]
[Warning: Due to your inappropriate actions, SAN value decreased by 1!]
The two mid-air streakers fell to the ground at the same time, screaming and clutching their backsides.
"Damn it!"
"Sh*t!"
The warnings continued popping up. Once they pulled their pants back on, the warnings stopped. Both of their SAN values had dropped to 89.
NeverShowOff rubbed his four-parted backside, wincing with each movement. "What is this thing?"
ProGamer_Daddy, still grimacing in pain, sat up on the ground.
"I don't know either. SAN value minus 1? These pop-ups? What does this even do?"
He noticed a question mark in the corner of the pop-up and clicked it immediately, his gamer instincts kicking in.
---
[Notice! To ensure the players' mental health and prevent confusion between the game and reality.]
['Chronicles of Aeltia' uses the latest brain cortex activity detection system to monitor the degree of confusion between reality and the game, datafied as SAN value.]
[If your SAN value reaches zero, 'Chronicles of Aeltia' will revoke your account. You will not be eligible for internal test slots within one major version.]
[We wish you a balanced life and healthy gaming.]
---
"Damn it, SAN value at zero means a direct ban?!"
ProGamer_Daddy's eyes widened in shock, his face paling slightly.
From where I stood, I could see he knew the game felt incredibly real, so it was natural for him to think the developers would take precautions. But clearly, he thought this punishment seemed way too harsh.
NeverShowOff looked constipated. "This is brutal..."
Unwilling to believe it, he pulled his pants down again.
[Warning: Due to your inappropriate actions, SAN value decreased by 1!]
The warning appeared instantly, accompanied by another jolt of pain. Frightened, he pulled his pants back up immediately, hands shaking slightly.
Fortunately for him, his SAN value only dropped by one more point.
"Man, I'm not risking my account," Logan muttered, clutching his pants tightly. "Haven't even gotten out of the newbie village yet."
"Yeah, better not get banned now," ProGamer_Daddy agreed, still wincing as he stood up.