Cassia: The Alpha King's Outcast Omega

When Lucian and Orion move far enough away that it's unlikely for them to surprise me by suddenly returning, I take a deep breath and release it before lowering my shields.

What I'm about to do could get me into a lot of trouble, especially if Minerva stumbles along. If she does, she'll find me wide open, all my emotions easy to read, who and what I am impossible to miss.

It's also not exactly a nice thing to read people like this without permission. But I have to know what Orion is going to tell Lucian about me. I know he doesn't trust me, and I have to know whether it's because he's guessed who I am, or if there's something else that I've said or done that has set his alarm bells ringing.

I could hobble closer to the house and eavesdrop the traditional way, but there's no way I'd be able to get close enough without one or both of them scenting me, and then I'd have some real explaining to do.

With the sun beaming down on me, concentrating isn't going to be something I can do for long.

I could've asked Lucian to carry me inside, except distance makes it harder. I learned that the hard way when I once saw Kieran and Nova wandering into the forest together from an upstairs window of the packhouse. By then, I'd been with the Frosts for months, so I knew what they were doing together and why they'd need privacy to do it.

But that didn't stop thoughts of them from tormenting me the way they always had since I first caught them sneaking off together before a pack run. So, I lowered my shields and tried to read their emotions so I'd know what they meant to each other.

I've never been in love before. My mother died when I was a baby, so I don't remember loving her. Certainly, I loved my father, but it was a distant and cold thing, which bore little resemblance to the warmth I saw between my packmates who doted on their children.

The only loving relationship I have vivid memories of seeing growing up was between my father's beta Kael and his mate, Keira, the pack healer. But they'd been together for decades before I was even born, so they didn't kiss or even hold hands. Whether they used to and stopped over time, or they never had, I was never brave enough to ask. Their love was and is a quiet thing, nothing like the passion and heat I'd grown up expecting to have when I found my mate.

It came with warm looks or the occasional lingering touch that I only caught when I was looking for it. So, I never knew what love, true love, looked like.

I thought I'd find it with Kieran, but I was wrong. I lost track of all the time I spent thinking about Nova and Kieran. I told myself that what they had was this mythical true love I'd always craved.

They disappeared into the forest often enough for it to seem that way to me. At least it did at first

I thought this made it more bearable to know the reason Kieran wasn't interested in me was because he loved someone else. But over time, I'd hear a voice in my head. It would say that what Kieran and Nova had couldn't be love if Kieran mated with me when he was already with Nova.

I'd think that if I loved someone, no one in the world would make me mate someone else. Not even my father, and I don't remember hearing anyone ever tell him no before. So, I tried to read their emotions as they disappeared into the forest, and all I got for my trouble was a migraine that lasted for three hours, and a bad case of dizziness that made me throw up.

When I missed dinner, Kieran's father came to visit me, probably thinking it meant Kieran had finally gotten me pregnant. One sniff later and he was away again, leaving me alone in a dark room with a pounding head and the world spinning around me.

No one else came to see if I was okay. No one cared.

But this time, the distance between me, Lucian, and Orion isn't as great as it was back then, and we're all outside, so it should prevent me from getting a migraine. Even if it does, if I learn something important, it'll be worth it.

Opening myself up like this isn't easy, and the only reason I know how is because the omega who trained me explicitly warned me never to attempt it. It takes every ounce of my concentration to cast my senses out in a tightly focused way because all around me I'm surrounded by living things.

At first, I don't manage it. Lucian's closest neighbours are several miles north, I pick up the sound of metal jangling, low murmured voice, a horse neighing, and a man who smells strongly of sweat. A farmer is preparing to ride the horse. Although the man has a rough, prickly exterior, he loves his animals. I can tell from the soft pastel shades of his soul. His every focus is on grooming the horse he soothes with gentle reassurances in its ear.

My senses snag on a wolf. A real one, and not a shifter. I hear him moving through the forest, running, seeking his mate. His soul is light and free, enjoying the freedom that comes with such a simple pleasure. All around me, I feel life in constant motion.

I catch the sharp agony of sudden death. There's the joy of a mother knowing she will be able to feed her starving children for another night, tainted with the worry of where the next meal will come from.

I prune away all the sounds and the emotions I don't need, and that will only distract me from the low murmured conversation from the two men who've moved even further away from the house than I thought they had.

Looks like I was right to be worried. There's no way Orion would've led Lucian so far from me if what he intended to tell him wouldn't alarm me if I accidentally overheard.

At the first prickles of a looming headache, I ignore it and pay attention. "—you, Lucian, this will not end well," Orion grumbles.

I frown at my first glimpse of his soul. He's a tight ball of emotions I'm desperate to read.

But if I attempt to peel back the layers like an onion, he will feel what I'm doing and know what I am. He's too tense and too controlled not to feel me.

What are you so desperate to hide, Orion? And why don't you trust me?

"And I'm telling you that we can't ignore the fact Cassia needs help."

"Which she can get someplace else. With another pack."

"Orion…"

"She's trouble, Lucian. Big trouble."

"Which you know how?" Lucian asks.

Orion falls silent, and I wince at the increasing pounding at my temples.